life at home... with the nutjobs

I have some miscellany to post, bear with me people. Oh... and yeah, I'm still home but the Chicklet has returned to school. Yay!

I know barfing sucks donkey arse... but seriously? Why my monster beagle Sharkdog felt the need to keep on walking as she barfed, leaving a slimy yellow trail as she went (like snail cooties), is beyond me. It was as if she trying to get away from the unpleasantness as it occurred. I ? Was not amused.

She's okay BTW, see?



Yeah and um, that snort you heard? Totally not me.

Oh, I have a question. Is there any one else out there like me? You see, I can't have fruit in the fruit bowl that still has a sticker on it. It bothers me and I don't know why. Apart from the apples, I take the skin of everything so really it shouldn't matter... but it does. Compulsive much?

Also, does anyone else dread the day when it's time to change the oil in the deep fryer? Do you have a coping mechanism? Or do you just move?



And why is it that even though I leave to go grocery shopping with a list and remember to bring our enviro-friendly bags I always end up buying exactly enough stuff to fill all the bags. Always. I bring 3 bags, that's all I fill. If I happen to bring in the 7 bags that are in the trunk of the car (like on Sunday) I manage to fill them all. I could have sworn that list I had needed 5 bags, MAX! We have 8 bags in total... why? Because I buy more when I forget them (yes, Brian... I too forget them), it's guilt. I should just leave them in the trunk all the time so I won't have to buy more. Unless they come up with winter ones, what?! On the plus side, I may not have to leave the house for a month. (7 bags of groceries... oy!)

Speaking of enviro-friendly... I'm afraid my Chicklet and I may be responsible for wiping out a small portion of the rain forest. For those of you that own stock in the tissue manufacturing companies... you're welcome. Now how about sending some of your windfall earnings our way. Chicklet wants a Wii. And no, the tissues didn't fill any of the enviro-friendly bags. Also, do NOT sick Al Gore on us. I don't have room in the freezer (I repeat, 7 bags full people!!!).



I have to send Captain Dumbass (go ahead, click on his name... only when you're done here though) a toque (pronounced took-eh!) or he'll freeze his brains.

I'm going to riffle through a box here, and even shop for it because if I have to knit it, he'll never get one.





I've also been wondering, why do birds suddenly appear... wait, why are the Carpenters on my iPod?

So Captain Dumbass, if you're game I'll totally send you a toque, just send me your snail mail.

always remember

...to empty the bathtub after your kid takes a bath.

So yesterday, in the hopes of washing away the ickies, Chicklet took a long leisurely bubble bath. When she was done, she got out, dried off (I know this because her jammies were dry although she was a prune) and put on the aforementioned jammies (they have penguins on them) to join me as we watched SYTYCD Canada before she was shooed to her own bed.



I remember asking her if she had pulled the plug in the bath and her "Oops!" response... She always forgets. I swear I had made a mental note to go back and correct her oversight. But the sticky note fell behind some other clutter in my brain.

I settled in for the night with our dogs snoring loudly in the room. Sharkdog was in her usual spot (hogging the bed) and Dumdum was by the bedroom door. That dog seems to prefer sleeping in front of doors. I think he keeps hoping I'll forget he's there, wake up in the darkened room to fetch water or visit the WC and trip over him and provide him with a carcass to scavenge. I'm actually giving him far too much credit. He is the "Pinky" to Sharkdog's "The Brain".

In the middle of the night, as I was sleeping soundly, the plan to take over the house went into full force.



Ok, actually, the dogs were thirsty and requested some libations. So... being the good hooman I am (if I do this quick I'll never really wake up... yeah... that's the ticket) I crawled out of bed and opened the bedroom door so the Trouble Twins could quench their thirst. They're like Hobbits with pints, I tell ya.

Dumdum started down the stairs towards the water bowl in the kitchen and Sharkdog was dragging her fat carcass (I really do love them... yeah...) behind him. That is... until I decided to visit the WC in the dark.

That my friends, is when all hell broke loose.

You see, Sharkdog has discovered the joys of drinking from the faucet in the bathtub.


and


SPLASH!



and


no! no! NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!




$%@&(?&!!!!!

Half wet dog... in the dark... wanting to go back on my bed... smelly... not a Bounce sheet in sight.... where the $@%$ is the towel?

Get back here!

No!

STOP!


ARGH!!!!!!!!!!

I need new jammies...

I hate you.

*stubbs toe*

$@%$

*Sharkdog smirking* I swear she was smirking!!!

*drool* Yeah, keep doing that Dumdum...

Great, now I'm awake.

What's on TV?



This morning, Chicklet was still icky. So... home again. After hugging Sharkdog until Sharkdog would be hugged no more she proceeded to hug Dumdum... who had enough right quick but is too much of a wuss to do anything about it.

The following ensued:

Me, the jello and soup maker extraordinaire: "Let him be, he looks miserable!"

Chicklet aka the Germ Factory aka the "why are you blogging this" whiner: "But I want to hug a dog! And I can't hug Chelsea (you know, Sharkdog's given name)!" (in her whiny sucky tone)

Moi: "Why not? She won't let you?" *snarf*

Germs: "Yeah.. and I don't want to... she has tuna-butt"

OH.DEAR.MERCIFUL.GOD!

Not THAT again!!!