Secret Santa Can Suck It *Gift* Swap - edited

When Bee told asked her blog readers that if they wanted to participate in a Secret Santa Gift Swap, I grinned a Grinch-worthy smile. I'd get to shop without crowds, I wouldn't have to spend any of my money (you know, like an heiress) and I was fairly certain I'd get to know a blogger I had never read before. Plus, it would give me a blog topic without having to come up with something myself.

Let me at it!

I was assigned a blogger and went on a recon mission in full stealth mode, mind you my little red fur-lined Santa dress and thigh-high boots made it hard to go unnoticed. Somehow I managed.


What I found was a fellow smartass, and a hottie at that! Lady Sarcasm aka Chica-X's alter ego... I searched high and low, and figured a smartass can always use:

A Portable Secret Trap Door (patent pending).

It might come in handy, whether it's to disappear when the Walmart greeter scopes you out, or some strange person follows you home for a smoke.

I can't tell you where it leads, well, I could but then what would be the point? Oh, I included the very cool "Get-Rid-Of-Rude-And-Stupid-People-By-Throwing-Them-Through-The-Door-Backwards" feature. That one? Lands idjits in a whole heap of trouble.


Now I'm going to run over to Bee's and find out who got me... I'm in trouble, I can feel it.

Many thanks and salutations to Jamie The Hussy Housewife aka Tinker Sugar Socks for the bountiful Red Dawn Survival Hussy Bag. I shall think of her as I use it, until the booze and happy pills kick in and I forget my own name.





So what's a Christmas gift giveaway without some music?

And what better than a USMC band - I see Topchamp tapping her toes and what a cute grin on ya there Travis!

This is one of my all-time fav Christmas songs and it is all kinds of awesome! The 1st Marine Division Party Band Earthquake makes me smile.

"It Must Have Been Ole Santa Claus"

Remember, if you travel over the holidays and are fortunate enough to cross paths with a member of the military, shake their hand, smile, say thanks, give them a hug, buy them a hot cocoa... do something people. Cause.... Santa's watching you.